New York, NY (June 4th, 2018)
Today, NoPhone LLC announced the world's first NoUpdate.
The NoUpdate enables humans to continue communicating with other humans without the distraction of updating a device.
Thanks to the NoUpdate, the NoPhone continues to be a technology-free alternative to constant hand-to-phone contact. In other words, it is a piece of plastic in the shape of a smartphone that helps people stay connected with the real world.
Is this the groundbreaking update NoPhone super fans have been waiting for? Probably not. But that's just the kind of thinking which founded the company in the first place. The NoPhone still features no features, no screen and no battery. Every employee at NoPhone is extremely proud of this year's release of nothing and look forward to not making improvements in the future.
“We're thrilled to announce the NoUpdate. It took us almost a year of spending time with our families around the clock to not update the NoPhone, and it's been wonderful.” said Van Gould, a Co-founder of the company.
It's unclear whether other companies will start implementing NoUpdates, but the NoPhone co-founders highly recommend it for people who want to live a full life.
Why does someone need a NoPhone?
Aside from numerous innovative contributions to the field of mobile communication, smartphones have inadvertently programmed a compulsory need in humans to continuously engage in physical contact with a piece of plastic. On average, a single device will use its technological wizardry to summon a user 150 times a day. This constant, near uncontrollable impulse for contact with mobile devices has noticeably diminished human-to-human interactions.
The NoPhone was created to combat the rapid decline of real life social engagement that has stemmed from chronic smartphone use. It’s sleek, plastic design serves as an idle hand’s security blanket and is devised to alleviate the constant need humans have to hold a mobile device without preventing users from fully experiencing their immediate surroundings.
The NoPhone was created by Co-founders: Van Gould, Chris Sheldon, Ingmar Larsen and Ben Langeveld.
To learn more about the NoPhone visit www.TheNoPhone.com.
For more information, please contact NoPhone at firstname.lastname@example.org